Confusion

Past was misery, broken dreams, lost expectations, painful, an untold story
We left the past far behind!

Present is smooth sail, ordinary blessing, well pronounced, well declared, well known!

Tonight, the past & present knew each other. Result could be confusion; even destruction.. .

Nothing happened!

"This is where the two worlds meet", Shepard boy screamed!

Our love!

Our love was not a failed one!
It was just a bit out-of-place.
Time and space couldn't adjust to it!

Our love was a miracle of Allah!
Nothing, from devil or any one, could ever retard it,
except our ''fears''!

In this world of dark chicaneries,
nothing to get fear from, but paper-made flowers.
Originality dares my dreams!

I don't have past, but do have memories
of some familiar lost faces, who have stripped me of my past!
I eschew their cold glances now! Still crave for their seldom notices!

My letter found its way back to me, like a reproach!
"PURE PAIN", as I wrote to be her address,
was found back.. only at my place!!

~Afterwind

Pain, defeat, loss and belief

The misery..
and pain
when get together,

causing the life to worsen..
smouldering the shimmering confidence..
& rusting the sheen of passion..

The loss is ultimate
the defeat is end!

In such a situations, there is the test of the believer's patience..
and also the trust he keeps on Thou, My Lord! O Sustainer of heavens!!

I sold myself in bazar,

I sold myself in bazar, to buy your 1 photo.. .

~ afterwind

Thank God..

Hope

when the heart was dim

everything seemed dull to these eyes

when the hope has come back

the life raised quite fresh 

standing in the flowing current of life 

~+~

Life Back

Flowers, flowers, every where

blessing, sunshine and love

why the heart is happy so much..

a dying hope resurrected

some one rose from dead

a putting off star became a sun

the spirals of mysterious fate

and its crests and troughs

and pains and fleeting happiness,

all estopped at a moment

no queasiness, nothing now,

but peace, timelessness and relief 

who took my heart and met me to the light of hope!

this is You, O my Lord! Allah!

the heart like a sponge..

at the moment you were leaving,

the heart

seemed dry,

and no tears!

at the moment you have left,

the heart is

like a sponge,

shrinks,

giving off a lot of water!

made me clean by my own tears

this night has pain of separation, 

and sufi music sound, 

and a little sweet pain in my heart,

  ..  tears in eyes,,,

            i was a sinner, you made me clean by my own tears

i can't cry, my heart is dead

my plane is taking off..

but

i can't cry

my heart is dead

because my heart is dead now

you think, i don't love you 

it is not true

still i love you

but i have forgotten how to miss you

pains, sorrows, disgrace, hunger and poverty

i have become a bird between fear and hope

separations and unions

many deluges of uncertainties and enforced austerities of life

have taken away my tears, awareness, smile and naive freshness

forgive me..

i can't cry

my heart is dead

but I still love you!

© afterwind

Picture source: by ericakulet [external link]

that will make you forget our love one day

"fear"

i told you

i told you

i already told you

you haven't reached the meaning of love

whatever you have toward me is nothing but ego and greed

in fact you never truly loved me

the tears you shed were the tears of a babe for a toy only

you don't know to sacrify, you just need to be gratified

with pleasures, words,,, lies and world!

i told you

i told you

i already told you

tonight

the last night before separation

when the withering heart needs compassion

when i need you

to soak my tears

to lower my soabs

in the very time when you are supposed to be with me

you are indulged in the pleasures, in the partying, in the lights

you say, let me enjoy, still i am yours!

now i also want to say

i don't want to come in between you and your happiness

but what should also i do!

from me, they are stealing you

busy, busy, busy

even on the last night

you don't want to listen to my heart cry

this time, even you don't want to be mine!

and still you say, "i love you"

i told you

i told you

i already told you

The light of enjoyment, taste of delicious food and happy puns of rich friends will make you forget our love one day

i told you

i told you

i already told you

if you keep on doing this,

how can you become mine?

~+~

"Sure"

No matter wherever you move away

I know, on your cheeks tears will have a sway!

The pain of separation makes you crazy

it will change a stone heart into daisy

no matter, to wherever you face, 

but if your hand is in my hand,

 

i shall take you into my cottage!

© afterwind

image sources:

fisrt,         lights in last night's rain storm by Zombie37 [external link]

second,     Rain Tapping On My Window by Thomas Steibl Photography [external link]

third,       Rain on the Train (Not in Spain) by jessamyn.n [external link]

fourth,     Rain wave - Muddy water by Yatzi [external link]

Empty hands..

~Prayer~

I begged for love

to come and fill up my heart

with its freshness

Heaven accepted my prayers

and my cravings and sobs voices

were coveyed to the love

who was busy in merry-making and comforts and pleasures

at the thousands of miles away into the celestial worlds

beyond red, green and grey mountains.. ah, the love...

~Arrival~

ah, the love

when it listened to my cravings

stopped every of its functions

fumbled hurriedly to take its shawl patched with pink stars, wrapped around its shoulders

and that star eyed embodiment, 'the love'

rushed towards me

keeping many stars of affection, kindness and love in its hands!!

~disappointment~

when it came to this our world,

it found a man of my 'name'.. "the human"

but it could never found the real me

standing at my address,

its face is down, and eyes are glum

~departure~

it came to receive a heart..

but here is nothing, except pains, greed, wars, tears, greeds, fitna..

what else could we offer as a gift

to appease its heart, 

which had been already lost somewhere in this world and

at last it was worried for the feelings of loss of emotions

so, it's returning to its unknown world empty-handed!

© afterwind

pictures from flickr as uploaded by lancelonie, Ann and Educated Savage

what is love..!!!

photo by dreamtwine

The way where we used to meet in past,

dust swirls over there now..

because there is no more vibrations of your sound there!

life has abandoned that way,

thus making my heart dusty and full of sorrow!!"

--

But life can sometime be a circle
we leave sadly from one point,
and soon we find ourselves reached at the same point again happily

every pain has a cure, because
God is the Great!

Sing.. sing.. sing.. transcend the skies..

Picture Courtesy, originally uploaded by Frogdeck.

oh holy pigeon of love
your eyes have every colour of life and feelings
your heart is always fluttering like a green flag of sufis
and nerves always flowing with the tears of emotions
oh sentient being
oh sensible heart..

this is not your place
this is full of contamination by griefs
ruined & dilapidated by miseries
aah.. garden and dry grass
and some murky sunlight
only autums resides here with few dry leaves

oh my heart!!
fly high.. go into the skies..
sing.. sing.. sing.. transcend the skies..

Best Gift

Photo uploaded on flickr.com by kdriese

Always a best gift should be presented to The Beloved!

a heart
which is made lush with the dreams of purity & love in this world.
like a goat is fed prepared with luxuries in the days before its sacrifice!

if this heart is broken..
then, this glass-crash will make a very big noise
- like a big destruction!

come what may..
prepare the gift for Beloved!

...

Oh Honey,
crash this heart-glass
by the Dazzling Reflexion of Your Beauty!

fill this heart-pot with the true honey of love and sympathy
not let it crash by the griefs & dismay
Oh Honey,

Pears for Holy Love!!

Pears
Originally uploaded by dean.franklin

oh my Desired One!

i say and write
these words
to please You!!

on one day, when my words
will all have been gone away
after having given You all of them!

then i will have none of them!

then i will give You my priceless
but best of tears!!
to make You pleased!


~+~



Wordly love sometimes kicks off the insane piteous heart and push it off into the realm of wonders: the Kingdom of True Love!
Let us pray for all insane lover and loser hearts!

hold my hands...

rain at my wallpaper
Originally uploaded by letas

she..
the salty vapours on your eye lids
the silent dark in your innocent eyes
which are shimmering when the light of any sympathy strikes on the brimmed cups of eyes and then reflects!

LOVE IS LIKE A SWEET WINE..
WHO TAKES IT IS LEFT UNCONSCIOUS!!
THE LOVER IS LIKE A FOLLOWER
STRIPPING AWAY ALL HIS OR HER OWN ATTRIBUTES
AND TAKING THE COLOURS OF BELOVED!

LIKE A RELIGIONLESS STARTS FASTING FOR A RELIGIOUS BELOVED!!

WHO COULD HAVE UNDERSTOOD THE CHEMISTRY OF LOVE?
EXCEPT THE SPECIAL ONES OR THE INSANE MASTERS!!

Oh.. MY ALLAH!!! why the night is always so beautiful
much drenched in the sweet pains of love!

become my brother!!

A dream-like state
Originally uploaded by BAD BAB

i feel myself a stranger here
this place is ice-cold
and damp
and
ah

i dont want to die
atleast in this heartless dampness

but i like to search a desert
which is full of love and warm with affinity
where you get no chance to cry like this
where no one let you go so silently or cold
where you can breathe in the peace
and can touch warm breeze
and warm chests
of deep coloured-skin brothers
whose big black faces and dangling lips
stretch when they become happy to see you
and their bright mild teeth come out to say 'a warm welcome'

the pink paleness in their eye-white is their humanity
the flickering small light in their eye-black is their hope

with stretched arms
in big pale and white robes

this tribe of love..
this caravan of belief
these people of God
are waiting for you!!

meet them!!

(c) afterwind

who looks at the trickling tears...

Kashgar, originally uploaded by [Zakkaliciousness].

exhausted and disappointed, while trying to hide emotions,
she uttered a sudden deep sorrowful sigh..
..."Aah!"

and it hit on deep in his chest
and he lost the standing of his self,

he tasted the sweet ionic charged warmth of that sigh,
felt the love,
and lost everything..

and eyes left drenched in tears and
empty chest left with air of sorrowful craving

'will she come back...?' HaHa... human being sometimes becomes very strange and complex!!

have you seen any wandering darvish, singing this in the street...

"who looks at the trickling tears...!?
except the loving 'God' everywhere !!"

May Allah guide and protect us!

where are you...!!??

The way where we used to meet in past,
dust swirls over there now..

because there is no more vibrations of your sound there!
life has abandoned that way,
thus making my heart dusty and full of sorrow!!

Cure for grief..

Photo: sun through smoke, gash creek fire, originally uploaded by Chris Lombardi.

A lover told him, "do love!"
he asked, "why?"
lover, "because love makes us mature, it teaches us how to be sincere.. how to sacrify for others"
he asked, "i dont know how to fall in love"
lover, "i dont know also.."
love was sitting there, it said, "it comes by automatic!"


someone said "At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet"
and he was going to became a poet


time passed and,
He fell in love for a girl..
she left for the unknown world..
he could not sleep that night..
always weeping.. without sleeping
it got unbearable..
he asked, "I dont know if i could live without her!"


Murshid(mystic saint) told, "Time is the great medicine"
as the time passed, he started forgetting her..
because "forgetting things" is a good gift from the God..
it was getting bearable
he said, "I can live without her!"



A famous american quotation of Rose Kennedy (wife of J.P Kennedy):
'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree.
The wounds remain.
In time, the mind, protecting its sanity,
covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens.
But it is never gone.



"but sometime it is hard to forget some sad experience!!"
he said, "sometimes my past grief gets afresh
especially, when does I listen to sitar (music)!"
he said, "time is not an ultimate medicine" - "then what is the cure?"
Murshid was not there - I was silent - he was depressed..


love was sitting there, it said, "love!" -
"love for everything in this world"
make your senses filled with love..
make your eyes "love" for everyone..
see in love.. walk in love.. laugh in love.. love!


the space left by previous (unfulfilled/lost) love
can not be filled by time..
for the time is nothing.. but an illusion
the space left by love can only be re-filled by equivalent thing
and it must be the love
so..
fill it with love..

"the love of everything shall lead you
to the love of the true one"

i asked, "what will be the next?"
love said, "eternity" - "plunge into his eternity"
i asked, "whom?"
love said, "The true one!"
i asked, "how to plunge?"
love said, "by losing yourself.. then, only he shall be there!"

as mansur al-Hallaj has said -
"Love is that you remain standing
In front of your Beloved
When you are stripped of all your attributes;
Then His attributes become your qualities.
Between me and You, there is only me.
Take away the me, so only You remain." (Mansur)

You glide between the heart and its casing as tears glide from the eyelid.
You dwell in my inwardness, in the depths of my heart, as souls dwell in
bodies.
Nothing passes from rest to motion unless you move it in hidden ways, O new
moon. (Mansur) read more..



love him who shall never leave you!
you cant never be without him
put your hand in his hand
i asked, "does he has material hands"
love said, "no.."
"don't restrict" - "He is He", (relevent reading..)
as the Quran says that nothing is like Him.
He is the noor (light) of heavens and earth..
He can not be witnessed with mortal eyes
He can be experienced with a true heart,
let yourself fall into his being..
who's being is always surrounding you, everything
and whole of the universe
who's in you.. out you


The Qur'an says:
Wherever you turn your face, Allah's face is there. (Surah al-Baqarah, 2:115)
We are closer to you than yourselves. (Surah Qaf, 50-16)
He is the First and the Last (every thing begins from Him and ends at Him),
and the Manifest and the Hidden. (Surah al-Hadid, 57:3)



at that time you shall see him..
not with your own eyes.. but with his eyes
because there will be nothing except him
his eyes will be yours .. his hands be yours..



The Last Prophet of Allah, Muhammad (sallal laahu alaihi wasallam) has explained that the Almighty Allah has stated: "He who has caused enmity with My Wali (Friend), I give him declaration of war. Among those acts through which My slave achieves My closeness, the most beloved are the Fardh (Compulsory) acts. My slave also achieves My closeness through the Nafil (Optional) deeds, till I make him into My beloved. When he becomes My beloved, I become his ears through which he listens, his eyes through which he sees, his hands by which he holds, his feet by which he walks. When he pleads to Me for anything I definitely bestow it on him. When he seeks refuge in Me from any bad deed, then I definitely save him from it."(Sahih Bukhari)



I asked, "shall it need effort?"
love said, "just fall!"
just plunge into him
with a sincere heart

aah.. Allah, my God!